Every Breath You Take

Thank you God for the blessings!
Yesterday, Ryan was taken off the Jet Ventilator. This is amazing news and an accomplishment because it means he is able to breathe more on his own. Also, it means that hopefully we will be able to hold him more often when we visit. He has gone down in his sedation settings so he is very alert and we are catching a lot more pictures with his eyes open. He is so handsome and it’s the most beautiful thing when he’s looking at you. His nurses really notice how well he is doing. His days are stable and the Lord, is really watching over him.

Hold Me Now Video

This is me holding Ryan in my arms for the first time.

One Month Old

On Sunday April 25th Ryan turned one month old. This was the longest and shortest month of my life. Everyday I see him and I'm just amazed at how strong he is and how he overcomes the challenges with baby steps. Happy one month, Ryan!

Hold Me Now

On Saturday April 24th I held my son close to my heart for the very first time. Ryan's primary nurse is so wonderful with letting me do as much for Ryan as I can While he rested in my arms listening to the familiar sound of my heartbeat, I felt peace. Martin captured the moment on video and with pictures. I love him so much and I can't wait for the days of kangaroo care.
Just in case your wondering what kangaroo care is I provided the following information.

Kangaroo care is the practice of holding your diapered baby on your bare chest, with a blanket draped over your baby's back. This skin-to-skin contact benefits both you and your baby. Kangaroo care can help your baby:

• Maintain his body warmth
• Regulate his heart and breathing rates
• Gain weight
• Spend more time being quiet and alert and less time crying
• Have a better chance at successful breastfeeding
  

Love is a Battlefield

I'm a little behind with the blog and that's mostly because all my focus has been on Ryan.

His first couple of weeks of life have just been a battle. The very first week we sat down with the neonatologist to be told that Ryan has an Intraventricular Hemorrhage (IVH), this is known as bleeding of the brain. There are four different levels (1-4) and Ryan shows a four on the left side of the brain and one-two on the right. Our most recent update is that there has been no progression of the bleeding or the mass. While the news we were given still leaves room for severe disability nothing is ever a 100%. We felt that we would leave that up to Ryan and God.

The following week we were told by the cardiologistt that Ryan needed to have a Patent Ductus Arteriosus (PDA) surgery. Ryan's ductus arteriosus remained open causing blood to fill his lungs and also, redirect back to his heart. This was a pretty standard surgery for preemies, but odds were not in our favor. Ryan had surgery April 14, 2010 and it was successful. He tolerated that surgery very well. The family was in great spirits.

Then, at 5 am I received a call. I was told by the doctor in the NICU that an infection in Ryan's abdomen had become apparent and harmful. His belly was inflamed and dusky. Ryan had Necrotizing Enterocolitis (NEC), his intestines were infected due to a perforation in his bowel wall. We headed over to the hospital as soon as we could. When we arrived we were told by the surgeon that he didn't feel comfortable performing the surgery. Ryan's vitals were weak and he just had surgery the other day. Instead they made an incision in his belly at the bed side to drain out as much of the infection and swelling they could. The hope was that this would buy us some time and allow him to get stronger.

The weekend passed and while Ryan was sick he was fighting. He was remaining stable. On April 20, 2010 Ryan had surgery again to remove any dead sections of bowel. We waited and it felt like it was the longest two hours of my life. We were told over and over that he was sick and that this surgery would be too much for his body. They were also concerned that when they went inside they would find too much damage. This sat on my mind and my heart. When the surgeon finally came back to speak with us it was with a smile. He said he got the best scenario, there was a very small perforation and they cleaned out what had spilled out into the abdomen. They diverted Ryan's abdomen through a stoma and it would later be reattached. This would allow Ryan to begin healing.

This was only the first couple of weeks of Ryan's life.

My Birth

On Thursday March 25th, it was just another day for Mommy and me. She worked while I danced in her belly. Then, she noticed some light spotting which concerned her and caused her to contact her doctor's office. We were seen at the office later that day where we all thought everything was going to be okay. Instead, we were told that we had already dilated to three which confused me. I heard her cry as Daddy drove us over to the hospital. While things seemed to move so fast we were admitted and put on bed rest. The goal was to keep me inside for as long as we could. I was only 23 weeks and coming up to 24, but it was still too early. I heard all the noise going on outside and I knew Mommy was worried. Mommy was told how critical time was for me. I was monitored and so was Mommy. Then at 9:30 am on Friday March 26th Mommy's water broke. It seems I was quite anxious to meet my family and the world.

I, Ryan Makaio Banda, was born at 1:04 pm. Since I was coming down toes first (breech) I was removed from my Mommy's belly via C-Section. Before they whisked me off to the NICU they rested me right against my Mommy's cheek. I seemed to steal the show that day since I had all these pretty ladies (nurses) fussing over me.

So, at the moment my home is the Long Beach Memorial Children's Hospital NICU. I have my very own isolette decorated with my own blanket and picture of my parents. This will only be my home for awhile because I will be coming home to my Mommy and Daddy in July where I have my very own room.